Wednesday, December 18, 2013

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

SF: On a par with the first installment. That is to say, from a cinematic point of view this is beautiful, has amazing effects, lovely scenery and the production value is excellent. The first hour was rather enjoyable, however I did find it dragged a great deal towards the second and third hours. However plenty of brilliant things about this (the effect of Thranduil's face) but equally many awful additions which made no sense to me at all (the love story) and didn't enhance the story in anyway. Dragon looks amazing! But wasn't thrilled by this movie as a whole. Of course I'll still see the next one 6/10

50 Eggs: I've just re-watched the first on DVD and, on reflection, it's actually fairly boring. This is much better though. All the things I was looking forward to seeing were in there, and I loved the 'extra' scenes scrounged from Silmarilion and Unfinished Tails, such as Gandalfs face-off with Sauron. I do agree with SF on one point though - the love story was ridiculous and unnecessary. The last act was the best, with Cumberbatch making an awesome Smaug. Credit to Freeman too - he is so much better than Elijah Wood ever was. 8/10

DonkeyB: n/a

Overall: 7/10

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

The Hunger Games: Catching Fire

SF: On a par with its predecessor, suffice to say its an average film. The visuals and set design are spot on but this suffers from the exact same flaw I loathed the previous version for - absolutely no depth to any of the three main characters. It astonishes me that this film and the franchise have so much potential and its clearly being wasted. Rather then listing all my grievances again see the previous review here. 5/10

50 Eggs: For me the first Hunger Games book should've been the last, as the quality took a sharp dip for the second, and a vertical plunge for the third. So no surprises that I feel the same about the film. The story just has no-where to go and it ends up been a poor-mans rehash of the first. It annoys me that this child friendly rubbish is so successful when what the world really needs is a full-on 18 rated remake of Battle Royale. 4/10

DonkeyB: n/a

Overall: 4.5/10

Monday, December 2, 2013

Saving Mr Banks

SF: You don't have to have seen or love Mary Poppins to watch this film but it will help. That aside this is a genuinely lovely film for the most part. There are some very emotional scenes and a number of touching moments. The director manages to blend the present sequence of events and memories in a nice fashion that isn't too condescending to the audience. Emma Thompson superb and rather understated performance is rather refreshing. The film manages to be moving and funny in just the right measure. 7/10

50 Eggs: n/a

DonkeyB: At the time I thought this was great fun, but I have to say as I've sat on this review for several weeks, I'm less and less enamoured with the film. I know I am biased against Mr Farrell, in fairness I did have to sit all the way through both 7 Psychopaths and Total Recall, but part of me was with the noisy German behind me who talked all through the film, dropped his change on the floor part way through (etc) when he took to shouting "why don't you just die already" every time poor Colin appeared as Mrs Travers' father. Way too much Australia. In the end however good Emma Thompson's performance (I would pay to watch her read out the phone book, but not Jane Austen) I was left wondering, to what end? 5.5/10

Overall: 6.25/10

Wednesday, November 27, 2013


SF: This is the type of film I'd normally avoid because its either going to be very sentimental or dull. I can't say it wasn't sentimental and there were some parts that didn't seem very cinematic at all. However this is not some sweet tear jerker or overstated epic and thus suits being rather plain in the direction. The performance from all were very engaging, Steve Coogan being serious was a revelation to me. The subject matter while nothing sort of heart breaking and horrific in many ways is handled very well and this all manages to maintain a nice level of humour. 7/10

50Eggs: n/a

DonkeyB: It's a moving story, told with not a little wit. I'm not a fan of Judy Dench (I know send me into exile), and as with the Queen I'm afraid I found the direction to be absolutely, mind numbingly boring to the point where I found myself noticing how televisual it was. It is funny though, and it does have something interesting to say about what faith is, and what forgiveness means. However much Coogan's character (Martin Sixsmith) is laughing/cringing at Philomena, and some of the people in the audience we were in were joining in- the film doesn't quite let them get away with it. 6.5/10

Overall: 6.75/10

Saturday, November 9, 2013


SF: I was avoiding seeing this film. Visually it is nothing short of brilliant (I'm a space geek). There were so many nice subtle touches in the direction that you are drawn into the the film within moments. It does brilliantly well to make you feel as if your in space without making the audience dizzy. The plot is simple and effective but without giving too much away can be a little over dramatist. Clooney was excellent and Bullock was ok, which did surprise me a bit. Be warned there are a few sort of cheesy lines but forgivable enough. Well worth seeing in the cinema rather then at home. 8/10

50 Eggs: Movie of the year so far. No film ever has portrayed so accurately what it must be like to be an astronaut. Yes there were a couple of errors with the physics, but overall the sense of wonder, loneliness, serenity and beauty  was utterly convincing. Coupled with an exciting story and fantastic effects, this is a must see. The Lynx advert was absolutely right  - 'Nothing beats an Astronaut'. 9.5/10

DonkeyB: In what I think is a first for this blog I decided to tag this post with not just the Director (who my erstwhile colleagues sometimes leave out) but the visual effects studio. They got to display their logo not just their name in the end credits and it is well deserved. As the regular reader (that's not a typo I know who you are) knows I hate 3D, but the reputation of this film had preceded it, so it was with not a little confliction that SF and I eventually opted for the 2D version. The film is visually and audio-logically stunning, so it is without hesitation that I say I am off to find a massive IMAX screen in 3D to watch it again, and I have no doubt I will enjoy it even more second time round. I believe that is enough of an endorsement. Its the film you most have to have seen in the cinema since Inception, it will make no sense whatever to wait for the DVD. 9.5/10

Overall: 9/10

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Thor: The Dark World

SF: Alas not as fun as the first outing.  The effects are fine, the plot passable and the general feel all worked. Plenty of it was filmed in London, which is always going to win me over some what. I enjoyed it on the whole as the action was OK but mainly I wanted Thor to have more substance and Loki to have more screen time. Generally the main thing it lacked was drive, everything was just ok and I might have got a tad bored now and again. 6/10

50 Eggs: A complete snoozefest. I used to love these marvel films but something has gone badly wrong with them recently. This isn't as bad as Iron man 3 (and certainly not as bad as Iron man 2), but it all just feels so...inconsequential. The action is just too much fit-inducing CGI. I want to see Thor hitting things with his hammer, not a shooty laser spaceship battle. Even the poster is a rip-off of Star Wars. Try harder marvel. 5/10

DonkeyB: Bored the arse off me to be honest. Cineworld also decided to leave some lights on throughout the screening, which is very unhelpful in a normal screening, but in a 3D film is tantamount to terrorism. Its hard enough to deal with the light loss and the fact as a glasses wearer I have two pieces of material to look through without having a spotlight bright enough to follow along with the (leaden) script setting up all kinds of internal reflections between the various layers of glass on my face..... So that spoilt it. Back to the film itself, the script is terrible, only lifted when Hiddleston is on screen. A film entirely of Loki might be interesting. James Hunt battling the most boring, existentially pointless, villains in history across 9 invented parallel universes (or whatever) is incredibly not. The scenes back on earth were at least moderately impressive- the problem with the entirely green screened films I seem to spend an inordinate length of time in these days is there is no sense of scale, or drama. 3/10
Overall: 4.5/10

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Captain Phillips

SF: Sadly this way one dull movie. I suppose the point was to have mounting tension but I found myself uninterested. The finale while tense and well executed didn't do much to save this. Tom Hanks is amazing and that's the only praise I have. Prehaps a bit more character development at the start might have helped. It is an incredible story And might appeal to some. 6/10

50 Eggs: This had been hyped quite a lot so my expectations were raised, and sadly not met. I don't know if it was the 12 oz burger I ate beforehand, but I got awful sleepy about halfway though this film. It's only 2 hrs, but it feels much longer because the middle section drags on a loooong time without ever really progressing the story. Having said that then ending is worth the wait; a tense and compelling finale where Tom Hanks gets to act his socks off. 7/10

DonkeyB: Wow. Mean reviews. Gripping from start to finish. This is arguably Hank's best performance ever. A role he seems born to play (its a testament to his growth and brilliance as screen actor that the same was also true of Big). The terrorists performances are also excellent. Oscar for Hanks please. Greengrass breaks out the shaky cam again to bring his signature style to the film, again having seen the film you can't imagine anyone else being able to direct it. A film about globalisation and culture clashes and the unintended consequences of 'The War on Terror'. 8/10

Overall: 7/10

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

The Wickerman (directors cut)

SF: This can only be described as one thing - trippy. I remember this being really sinister but this time just odd. Still think Edward Woodward was great though. 3/10

50Eggs: n/a

DonkeyB: I have the DVD which included a lot of previously 'lost' material, which I believe had turned up in a landfill under the M25 when they were excavating to build more lanes. I didn't really notice any more material, but it's a long time since I last saw the film. It's a seminal film but one I don't think has dated very well, the music and the scenery make it well worth a trip to see it on the big screen, but unfortunately I think the power of the film have been diminished over 40 years. 7/10

Overall: 5/10

Saturday, September 28, 2013

The Great Beauty (La Grande Bellezza)

SF: I've been attempting to classify this film with no luck. After a very long drawn out intro that appears to make no sense the protagonist appears. He seems to flit from one social gathering and introspective wandering to another, showcasing Rome. Some scenes are very beautiful but others dull and I'm missing the point of it all. There is one very lovely piece of music that play throughout which I did rather like. However The film is not really my taste but I can see how others would love this. 4/10

50eggs: n/a

DonkeyB: Stunningly beautiful, strange and eccentric. A film about nothing and everything, the frequent references to philosophy might strike some as pretentious though. I loved it. I stayed all the way through the credits to the end and could quote easily have watched it again straight away. I should also say it is in parts utterly hilarious- the cardinal is particularly funny. 9/10

Overall: 6.5/10 (which is ridiculous it should either be high or low)

Monday, September 23, 2013


SF: Brilliant and enjoyable movie following the start of Jackie Robinson's prolific career in baseball. Harrison Ford gets one amazing line after another, which really adds a great deal of humour. A good balance of serious issues, baseball and entertainment (after all its still a film). The acting is spot on, the production design looks authentic to me and the result is a film that leaves you feeling a little inspired. I'm only sad this isn't getting a wider release in the UK. 8/10

50Eggs: n/a

DonkeyB: What a week its been for sport films. Another film designed to appeal to the Blue Donkey. Its a terrific film because it has one at its heart a powerful and moving story about Jackie Robinson's first years in the Dodgers organisation breaking the baseball colour line. If the film does nothing else but introduce more people to the great human beings who were, Jackie and Rachel Robinson, Branch Rickey, Pee Wee Reese and Red Barber that just might be enough. They are magnificent and inspiring company during the film and  anyone who wants to know more should check out The Boys of Summer by Roger Kahn; also about the Brooklyn Dodgers. Go see the it if you can. 8/10

Overall: 8/10

Sunday, September 15, 2013


SF: This film is nothing short of brilliant. Following the rivalry between formula 1 drivers James Hunt and Niki Lauda, I felt this had the right balance of racing and investment in the main characters. Not being a fan of the sport I was worried I'd be a tad bored but within ten mins I was hooked and the pace is consistent throughout. The last ten minutes of the film in Japan were so tense I almost asked DonkeyB to tell me what happens. Well worth a viewing on the big screen. 8.5/10

50Eggs: At last F1 gets a decent movie (I'm excepting Senna on the grounds that it was a documentary). More than decent, in fact it's one of the best films of the year. My knowledge of F1 only stretches back as far as Nigel Mansel so I didn't know the plot at all and consequently was enthralled. The drama is intriguing, the racing exciting and the cast is brilliant. And I don't usually notice music in a film but it really added to the racing scenes in this instance. 8.5/10

DonkeyB: I am/was a big F1 fan, and a monster history buff; so while not having been born when the 1976 season played out, I knew every detail of the story of this film before I even knew it existed. There are probably space nuts out there who were in a similar position with Apollo 13. The film is good, it's not great. It's largely accurate but I found the fake tv anchor grating, but I have to say Simon Taylor's presence was great fun and a nice nod to F1 aficionados. Taylor was in his first year as the BBC's radio commentator in 1976, and apparently he helped with the film production. It was a nice and fairly authentic touch to include him for some exposition along the way. 

There were other minor things that annoyed; Taylor pinched a Murray Walker line, the cut from Hunt joining (or re-establishing membership of) the mile high club to the pistons of his Cosworth engine was crass and they transposed the famous incident of the gear knob coming off from a non championship race in 1974 to the final race at Fuji in 1976- the story and the race are dramatic enough without that. 
I also thought they over played the rivalry, Lauda and Hunt were friends as they came up through the junior formulas. There was lots they left out which was excluded for length (not least Hunt's disqualification at the British GP) , but all these quibbles are additions which were unecessary. 

Nevertheless it is a thrilling story, well shot and Daniel Bruhn truly excellent as Niki Lauda. I think they captured the grimy glamour, spirit, speed, terror and occasional horror of what was probably the greatest season of F1. 8/10

Overall: 8.33/10

Wednesday, September 4, 2013


SF: This was utterly pointless. Save your money. Essential they've made a less interesting version of Pitch Black. Except this time all the good parts were gone. I honestly kicked myself for not having a nap. Even Katee Sackhoff couldn't do anything to make this less boring. What I can't understand is why they bothered making this. Little to no plot, the acting barely registered and even the effects were merely ok. I'm only giving marks because the dog thing was cute.

50Eggs: n/a

DonkeyB: Green screened to within an inch of it's life. Misogynist and homophobic, not helped by the morons who were in the screening with us laughing along with the attempted rape scene. Also deeply, deeply boring. A film of absolutely no merit whatsoever. Comparable only to seven psychopaths in how much I hated it. 1/10

Overall: 2/10

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

We'e the Millers

SF: More entertaining than expected, not bad at all for a Jennifer movie. Surprisingly funny, excellent outtakes - 3 green dresses from me!

50eggs: n/a

DonkeyB: Here it is- as the poster suggests; in which Jennifer plays a stripper. Not just any stripper but a stripper with a heart. You know what? It's funny- its funnier than almost all the Project Jen films so far. Damning with faint praise? Maybe but at this point in the list beggers can't be choosers. The film's cliche, the review is cliche. Does anyone care? 3 and a half green dresses: the top half- what a shame it would be to cover up Ms Aniston's bottom after all the work she did to get it into the film.

Almost forgot- two degrees of separation news Jason Sueikis is present (again)- he's also much the best thing in the film and presumably responsible for at least one of the hilarious outtakes.

RATING 3.25 Green Dresses

Monday, August 26, 2013


SF:  After District 9 I wasn't sure if Neill Blomkamp had another original sci-fi in him. Elysium is a good film but sadly predictable. The story has been done, I spent a great deal of time being reminded of the excellent Battle Angel Allita and even a bit of In Time as well as a few other films of a similar ilk. Having said that I did enjoy the film and thought the acting was well executed, Sharlto Copley is outstanding, I almost didn't recognise him. However the camera is far to shaky on much of the action which tends to annoy me. Also I don't think the film has enough focus or emotional investment in the main character. Lots of potential, enjoyable, but sadly lacking 6/10

50 Eggs: This is a lot like the directors previous effort, District 9; an interesting concept film that becomes increasingly violent and action oriented.And whilst I thought D9 was overrated, I actually enjoyed Elysium more. Some of the images are striking and there are a few great sci-fi moments. I felt a little short changed by the second half where the story takes a back seat, but it's worth a watch. 7/10

DonkeyB: n/a

Overall: 6.5/10 

Friday, August 16, 2013

Project Jen- We're the Millers

This film presents 3-4-1 with exiting synergies, to present our end users with best practice recommendations from a reduced number of belly buttons to push. We can showcase for all our users an improved matrix of options within the same core envelope of current distributions.

That's right it's the first theatrical release of a film starring Jennifer Aniston since the start of Project Jen! Two birds one stone people!

Look out for our review in the next few weeks.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Alan Partridge: Alpha Papa

SF: I've only ever seen clips of Alan Partridge so didn't have major expectations. The last Steve Coogan film I watched was Around the world in 80 days, a painful horror of a film. Fortunes smiled on this one, thoroughly funny from start to finish. The plot wasn't amazing but worked fairly well, the cast was fantastic and the jokes plentiful. Well worth a watch 7.5/10

50 Eggs: The Alan Partridge series are in my top 5 all time sitcoms. This is essentially the same formula but it didn't quite do it for me. It keeps everything that is good about the series, but for some reason loses the feel of it. I've got a horrible feeling that the thing that might be lacking, strangely, is the canned laughter. Still a good way to pass a couple of hours. 6/10

DonkeyB: More than funny enough. Iannucci is transforming his comedy stylings to film with great effect. I'm afraid it was still a little televisual, but I did feel a little like that might have been my own prejudice rather than the film's fault: there were a few scenes at the start in Alan's car which felt too eerily familiar. Perhaps this was to reassure long term fans, I didn't need it. Maybe because I trusted all involved so implicitly- I had forgotten around the world in 80 days existed. 7.75/10

Overall: 7.25/10

Despicable Me 2

SF: I only recently saw the first Despicable outing and rather enjoyed it. I have minion love so was looking forward to this but not expecting much. The story is ok here, nothing amazing but does well to be different from the first one. Plenty funny and lovely animation but there is a lot better out there. Still very enjoyable so 6.5/10

50 Eggs: The problem this sequel has is that it's whole 'raison d'etre' was covered in the first film: Evil genius turns good. Finished. Done. There's really nowhere else for this to go, which is why it was never going to be as good as the original. It all just feels a bit unnecessary. That said, there are some funny jokes, the animation is colorful, and the minions are good value. But how come this gets a sequel while Pixar continue to ignore the potential of the brilliant Incredibles...and at the same time taunting us by making rubbish like Cars 2! 6.5/10

DonkeyB: n/a

Overall: 6.5/10 (for once we agree!)

Sunday, August 11, 2013

Now You See Me

SF: One word for this film - Entertaining. Does pretty much what it sets out to do, a few magic tricks, twisty plot and a tiny bit of intrigue to keep you guessing. Mark Ruffalo and Morgan Freeman are excellent as usual  and Jesse Eisenberg does pull off the smugness (reminiscent of The Social Network). It's not going to win any awards and you might not watch it again but still enjoyable and there are a few laughs. 6.5/10

50 Eggs: Stupid and clever at the same time, but as long as you're not out to pick holes you'll enjoy this. The script isn't bad at all, but its the cast that raise it up a notch into the 'pretty good' category. Isla fisher is the least believable, with her screechy shouting voice she uses on stage, but with pins like that, who is going to argue. I'd heard the ending was a cop-out, but I thought it was just fine. 7.5/10

DonkeyB: It has a great cast, which was the main reason to see it, but somehow I had managed to miss the fact that Mark Ruffalo was even in this film. I always like Mark Ruffalo. As SF has said it won't win any awards but it is never boring, there is always something to look at (no snickering about my Isla Fischer obsession), unfortunatley too often for a film about magic this is big film effects. Melanie Laurent deserves a mention as the best performance in the film, standing out amonst this strong group is notable. I'm always impressed when anyone acts in a foreign language- I can hardly order a pizza! 6.5/10

Overall: 6.75/10

Monsters University

SF: Pixar set a high bar, so with a sequel there are a lot of expectations. having said that I enjoyed this as much as Monsters inc which is the most praise I can give. Great sense of humour, amazing animation, fun plot - everything you would want. Charlie Day surprised me, excellent voice to monster matching. Look out for all the little in jokes. Go enjoy yourselves 8/10

50eggs: n/a

DonkeyB: Disappointing. At their best Pixar make beautiful films, with strong traditional stories which somehow still manage to surpise. Unfotunately, this lacks much of the charm of the original and is a basic Campus comedy of which we have all seen quite alot. It is essentially exactly the same film as Pitch Perfect but nothing like as funny. I'm sure the kids will love it, but it has much less for the adults than some of Pixar's best efforts. 5/10

Overall: 6.5/10

Wednesday, July 31, 2013

The World's End

SF: Oh well they tried. Sad to say this film is all expectation and no delivery. The performances are ok, the humour present and the story easy to follow but lacked pace. I only laughed twice. Too much random fighting, a lot of seemed to be to just fill the time and the end didn't fit at all. Sadly just 4/10

50Eggs: n/a

DonkeyB: Urgh. Its a "British Comedy", it is rubbish. An absolute waste of Considine, Marsan and Pike. Does Rosamund Pike have a lazy eye? Because it looks like she does for most of the film. Pegg and Frost need to watch themselves they have both been in a whole heap of crap recently- this way Chevy Chase lies. 3/10

Overall: 3.5/10

Saturday, July 27, 2013

Pacific Rim

SF: Godzillas v Steel. If you like any of the following, Power Rangers, Godzilla, Clash/Wrath of the Titans, Transformers, Real Steel, Gundam and Guyver, you will love this. So naturally I thoroughly enjoyed it. Excellent special effects, fights on a crazy scale, enough plot and script to hold it together but not enough to ruin pace or bore you. The last thing anyone wants with something like this is too much explanation (see Transformer 2 & 3). A nice amount of cheesy humour and yes you can predict the ending but that's fine with me. Delivers everything you'd expect, don't take it too seriously. 7/10

50Eggs: There were several moments of the script that were so bad that I wondered if it was in fact a Paul Verhoeven style satire. But no, its just bad. What is good, and the reason for my reasonable score, is the action and effects. The first few Robot v Monster scenes are stunning, and the creature design is outstanding - I couldn't wait to see what monster they would come up with next. But even on this front I have to end with a gripe: the film is constantly building up to a huge battle royale finish, but the specific setting for the final fight means the epic scale evident in earlier scenes is completely lost. And so, a mediocre 5/10

DonkeyB: Refused to watch.

Overall: 6/10

Sunday, June 30, 2013

World War Z

SF: I'm going to call this "I am Outbreak". However it is very hard not to be a bit derivative when making a zombie film. This does well to try and forge newish ground - perhaps being based on a book explains the good character development. I enjoyed this and was rather impressed. It keeps the pace and doesn't overstay it's welcome. Could be the best Zombie flick since 28 days later. 7/10

50Eggs: I'll go one further than SF and say that this is better than 28 days later. WWZ is a realistic take on the zombie genre, where the nature of and reaction to the outbreak all seems plausible. The film does have a very defined start, middle and end which is apparently due to the script being rewritten. But for me this just makes each part more distinctive; grand scale action at one point, intimate horror at another. Good end too - looking forward to the sequel. 8.5/10

DonkeyB: A film of two halves. Starts off like a train and keeps going all the way to Israel, via an aircraft carier in the Atlantic and north Korea. And then finishes on a south Wales industrial estate! I like the little politcal jokes, and it made me interested to read the source material. Much better than the news stories about its troubles gestation suggest. Dr Who battling Zombies- will only add to the impression that the second half is very televsiual though. 7/10

Overall: 7.75/10

Sunday, June 23, 2013

Man of Steel

SF: I can't tell you how much I loved the first two Superman films by Richard Donner. After the horror that was Superman Returns, a new film was desperately needed. This incarnation surprised me by how different it was from the predecessors but without giving too much away I found it very enjoyable, imaginative and more serious than expected. Henry Cavill did a brilliant job and Lois Lane was fiery - like she is supposed to be. Also beautiful cinematography. Well worth a watch. 7.5/10

50Eggs: Hooray! My most anticipated film of the last year turns out to be brilliant. The opening half hour is as unexpected as it is action packed, and does a great job of giving us a new take on the origin story. Things continue in this vain, showing us more of the mythology than in any previous Superman film, whilst simultaneously ramping up the action to unprecedented levels (admittedly it's somewhat relentless but, unlike the awful Transformers films, you can at least see what is going on). The cast is uniformly great but special mention to Henry Cavill for nailing it and for being proper stacked. My girlfriend actually made an unintentional swooning noise when he got his pecks out. 9/10

DonkeyB: Review delayed! Oh the humanity (or Alien being with a moral inclination to save it). The first part on planet Zod or whatever is boring, sub school kid look how smart I am nonsense . Then there is a brief interlude in which earth bound Clarke struggles with his developing super powers- this part was good, I actually started to find myself caring about the characters. It was over all too quickly. The relationship between Clarke and Louis must go down as one of the worst on screen romances in history; negative chemistry between Adams and Cavill. Then the hitting things with things started and it is long and boring and pointless. And the further away from the film the more I resent it. Crap. 3/10

Overall: 6.5/10

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

The Reluctant Fundamentalist

SF: I wasn't too keen on seeing this film, especially as I'd heard very mixed reviews about the book. Thankfully I need not have worried. This film is excellent. The acting is engaging and never over played, the story compelling and the direction spot on. Yes I saw a few things coming but it didn't matter. Well worth a watch. 7/10

50Eggs: n/a

DonkeyB: Another literary adaptation, another plot device to allow narration. This time I haven't read the book so the device might be in the book. However, this makes a more interesting counterpart to 0D30 than The Great Gatsby. Very good; interesting, thought provoking people should see it. It's not perfect- there are parts which seem a little trite and it falls back into cliche once or twice- but it's a film that's trying to be about something and it has an opinion. 7/10

Overall: 7/10

Thursday, May 16, 2013

The Great Gatsby

SF: As a novel The Great Gatsby really is a masterpiece. I've seen a few different takes on it over the years so my opinion is going to be very tainted. My first impression was that visually this fulfills everything a Baz Lurhman film alludes too. There are plenty of points that I thought really captured the mood of a particular scene. But for all its glitz and glamour the subtle character driven core is sadly lacking. This is a mere silloete of a superior work. The more I think about it the more I find missing. Suffice to say DiCaprio and McGuire do fantastic jobs, no doubt in another interpretation I would have loved this entirely. However to me The Great Gatsbty was more than we are shown in this pale, overly long offering. 3.5/10

50 Eggs: Good things: the soundtrack is inventive and clever, the visual style is interesting (several shots looked like paintings) and Carrey Mulligan manages not to stink up the screen for fact I'll begrudgingly admit that she is pretty good in this. Bad things: the story is on the dull side. I accidentally took a micronap and my foot spasmed into the back of the chair in-front of me. 5/10

DonkeyB: Ech. I should start by saying that I love the book. It has a pretty good case for being the greatest novel ever written, it is certainly one of the best five I have read. I have seen the 1974 Robert Redford film version. I have an audiobook version with Tim Robbins reading..... Last year SF and I attended a London staging of Gatz the Elevator Repair Service's staging [reading] of the complete unabridged text over 8 hours! I like it... alot. That being said the plot is really not all that important- it's a basic melodrama which wouldn't be out of place in your average soap opera- it serves the same function as the plot in Shakespeare or an opera, its only there to hang the art on. In that respect it is not really filmable.

I deliberately didn't read or listen to reviews before I went to see it, here is a rare occurrence where I felt like I had the required skills to judge the merits of the film and it wasn't just hubris on my part.

Parts of the film look fantastic (literally), however the green screening is a bit shonkey; from about halfway through the actors all looked cut out and stuck on the out of focus background, which is exactly what they were. The film itself is frustrating: the overall impression you get is that no matter how much Luhrmann loves the book- he didn't get it. The parts of the film which deals with the parties are pretty well done, but its pretty clear Baz thinks these are what his film should be about! Mr Z's soundtrack I hear has been contraversial but it really shouldn't be, I thought it worked well.

PLOT SPOILER not sure how to discuss this without giving away part of the plot (which isn't important remember so carry on reading), it appears that Baz thinks the Great Gatsby is a morality tale in which the upstart, nouveau riche, millionaire bootlegger gets his comeuppance for all the wild parties he threw and drags everyone he encounters down with him. Whereas the book is subtle and haunting and sad, the film is loud, over the top and simple. It is quite frustrating because I think DiCaprio genuinely understands Gatsby the character, but also what the book is about. I just don't think Baz does. It is not terrible it just isn't The Great Gatsby. 5/10

Overall: 4.5/10

Saturday, May 11, 2013

Star Trek - Into Darkness

SF: Enjoyable second instalment to the Trek reboot. I think most fans will be pleased with how this turns a few things about. Like its predecessor, a nice blend of action, humour and twisty sci-fi plot surprises, what more could you ask for? Cumberbatch pulls off his villainous role perfectly and does anyone else wonder if Chris Pine is wearing lipstick? Chances are I'll go see this again and soon. Which is all I can say without spoilers 8/10

50 Eggs: I don't know why it's called 'Into Darkness', but no matter, this is really good. The action is brilliant and the story pleasingly 'Trek', even continuing the split reality theme of the last film. The only downside is that it cant quite live up to its immediate predecessor as it lacks the surprise factor...also I'm pretty sure there is a plot hole that I've yet to solve by scanning the FAQs. Still, a great addition to the series (so much better since the reboot), and I'm adding a point on as I saw it in Imax 3D - it looked amazing. 9/10

DonkeyB: I think it is called into darkness because its in 3d (for some people) and therefore by definition darker. Before you consider my review you should know the following: I've never seen any of the first 10 Star Trek films (in fact I wasn't really aware there were 10, in my mind I knew a few existed- if you asked me to put a number on how many I'd have guessed 4), I've never seen an episode of any of the tv series all the way through and I saw the last film on a plane and probably fell asleep because I don't remember anything about it. So here's what I thought, the plot was difficult to follow but that's a good job because its ludicrous. It is funny in places- mostly Spock who in my (informed only by popular consciousness) opinion seemed perfect. There is an unnecessary undressing scene for one female character to rival deep blue sea (the shark one). It looks pretty good, but it should have been called Star Trek- "get out of my face with that camera", because I was constantly trying to lean back as every shot looked zoomed in. The captioning and subtitling are oddly positioned. It is TOO LONG. There are two too many endings. There are lots of shots which make you think that Abrams was rehearsing for Star Wars, and I wouldn't be at all surprised if some Trekky people hate this film with a passion because it is much more of a space action film than anything with any intellectual weight. All that being said cumberbatch is annoyingly brilliant as usual and I wasn't bored. 7/10

Overall: 8/10

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Evil Dead

SF: As a fan of the original, this was going to have work very hard to impress me. Firstly, at no point did I laugh. The point of Evil Dead was that its soo over the top its funny and yet very creepy. Secondly this is just your bog standard uber violent horror. If that is all you are after you won't be disappointed. Recent offerings mean that cinema is littered with these run of the mill films. In its favor I might not sleep for a while. However this it is not what an Evil Dead remake should be. Perhaps if I had nothing to compare it to I might have liked it a tad more.  Sadly it looks like comedy horror is becoming a lost genre. There are better offering out there 5/10

50Eggs: The remake of a film I haven't seen that inspired one of my favourite ever films, 'Cabin in the Woods', was always going to be a difficult one to review. But to keep it short; I liked it. The set-up contains a few of Horrors usual 'why are you doing that?' moments (i.e stop reading from the creepy book!) but equally comes up with a fairly believable mechanism for why the cast don't just leave at the first sign of trouble. That helps to keep you invested throughout the build-up and to then have sympathy for the characters during the absolutely relentless, eye watering violence that follows. 8.5/10

DonkeyB: n/a

Overall: 6.75/10

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Iron Man 3

SF: It is no Iron Man 1 but it had plenty of good points, comic nods, surprises and does well to keep the continuity of the previous marvel movies going. The visual effects are as ever brilliant, the story takes cues from the Extremis story (which can only be a good thing), so worked on the whole (I might have liked it to be more faithful). The only problem is that this one just didn't have that spark you expect from super hero films. Also Pepper Potts gets more annoying as these go on. It's still good and fans are likely to enjoy it, but something was missing and I don't just mean the lack of AC/DC on the soundtrack 6.5/10

50 Eggs: Iron Man 2 was fairly awful, serving no discernible purpose other than to staple together this series with the other 'Avengers' films. Iron Man 3 is better, but it's still a disappointment. The plot is nothing special, the bad guy is dull, and there is little in the way of peril. The last half hour contains the best action of all three films though. I'm getting tired of these Marvel films now...I'm putting all my chips on DCs 'Man of Steel'. 6/10

DonkeyB: I have nothing very interesting to say about Iron Man 3. If you liked the first 2 you'll like this one too. Better than 2, worse than 1 and Avengers Assemble. Ben Kingsley is both funny and a reasonably clever plot point for the comic book fans (SF assures me this is true). However if you've seen his Watson to Michael Caine's Holmes in 'Without a Clue' then you may have some idea what is going on with his Mandarin. Robert Downey Jr has made Tony stark one of the more amusing super heroes to spend two hours with every other year, but at some point don't all these overlapping story arcs and characters start to eat each other? At some point we will all get bored of complaining that they keep making these films too long and baggy in the middle, but I feel duty now to point out that it is. 6.5/10

Overall: 6.33/10

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Olympus Has Fallen

SF: Once this gets going there are non-stop explosions, shooting and madness. It is truly ludicrous. Which is why I found it so funny. Antoine Fuqua, is a baffling director, sometime he does great films and then other time you get films like this. The only way it could have been improved was if Gerrad Butler occasionally winked at the camera. How they got Angela Bassett to be in this, I've no idea. It has more plot flaws than I have time to moan about but it wasn't horrific. Just not so bad it was good. I think this was trying to be Die Hard meets Air Force One but fails to be anywhere near as good as either. 4/10

50Eggs: Super low expectations saved the day here as I actually really enjoyed this. The taking of the White House is staged very well and comes within a whisker of being believable, especially as it doesn't shy away from being brutal. That brutality is a running theme that you wouldn't normally see in a popcorn flick so big tick for that. I also really liked the story when it was heading in a 'North Korea are not as crazy as you think' direction...although without spoiling it that feeling faded before the end. 7.5/10

DB: So bad it's bad. Preposterous from start to finish. A terrorist plot based on everyone who works at the top of American government to be not just stupid, but lilly-livered surrender monkeys. If someone captures the President and holds him hostage for information to destroy the country, anyone of sound mind would respond to threats to the Whitehouse building and the person of the President with; "fuck it, they're called symbols for a reason. If we have to we'll kill them ourselves to protect everyone else." Anyone who thinks any different is deluding themselves. 2/10

Overall: 3/10

Friday, April 19, 2013

Project Jen - The Break Up

Or "Break - The Up", as LoveFilm labels it.

There is absolutely no reason for this film to exist, it is utterly pointless, I didn't even sense that the sides of my mouth might be nearly about to turn up. It is not funny at all.

One issue I have with this film is, I like A-Capella singing (well I liked Pitch Perfect), Modern Art and baseball.  The film seems to be saying that these interests are mutually exclusive which is the main reason the protagonists break up.

Jason Bateman makes an appearance, so perhaps this film exists solely to help complete the 2 degrees of separation Jennifer Aniston project, which could become a spin off.

Besides that nothing of note happens in this film.

On the plus side Vince Vaughn is perfectly cast as the irritating motor-mouth oaf Jen is eventually glad to be rid of.

I think the "twist" is that it's a romantic comedy about two people who break up, and they do break up.
They don't break up and get back together at the end, which I guess most of the target audience are expecting.

They end the movie literally walking off in different directions and are happy with it.

I know I ruined the ending, but if revealing that puts you off seeing the film I've done you a favour.

RATING: 1 Green Dress

Friday, April 12, 2013


SF: This was a long and tedious waste of time. I would really advise you not to bother if you have anything better to do such as cleaning your fridge.  The Special effects and cinematography were lovely which are only positive things I've been able to think of. 3/10

50 Eggs: n/a

DonkeyB: I thought it looked stunning, apparently they used some new experimental cameras or something: you could see the difference. We saw a 2D version, if you will insist on seeing this I think it would be worth paying to see a 2D IMAX print (if such a thing exists) because as SF says the visuals are the only thing of any interest here. From start to finish the plot feels derivative, watching the film would perhaps be very enjoyable at home on DVD with a group of film fans and an i-Spy book of Sci-fi and post apocalypse films. In the cinema I had the constant feeling of "oh, we're doing that now are we?". It is really quite long and quite boring. 4/10

Overall: 3.5/10

Monday, April 8, 2013

Project Jen- Sky Advert

Shadow falcon suggested I review Ms Aniston's advert appearances in the cinema this week. I wasn't really aware what she was alluding to, in my mind if you mention Jen and adverts I think shampoo. However, while watching the football this evening I encountered a new Jen advert and one to which I assume SF was referring, it is for a popular provider of satellite television broadcasting and Internet and telephony services, specifically their service to ease the frustratingly difficult process of changing your Internet provider.

I hate adverts- I have nothing much to say about the ad itself, other than that it is slightly stupid and the creative idea behind it appears to be; we can get Jennifer Aniston to be in out advert, it doesn't really matter what else happens in it, once everyone sees her they will automatically use our service. Apart from Jen being in it, it is totally unmemorable.

Demand more from your Jennifer Aniston film reviewer.

Demand more from third rate television actresses who try to launch a movie career.

Friday, April 5, 2013

Project Jen- Rumour Has It

Normally here at 3-4-1 we don't discuss the plot of the films we review very much. This is because we know that everyone hates spoilers. However, the "plot"of this film does require some reference.

The idea is that Jen's family in this film, is the real family that the "The Graduate" was based on, and that the real Benjamin might be her real Dad. It has a pleasing possibility of intricate plotting and classic movie references. Also it is directed by Rob Reiner and scripted by the person who wrote Ocean's Eleven so it should be great fun.

There are a few things everyone knows about the Graduate - like the fact that Robert Redford was originally cast as Benjamin but turned the part down because he thought he was too old, only to be replaced by Dustin Hoffman who was in fact even older. To add to the irony, Anne Bancroft who was supposed to be old enough to be Hoffman's mother was actually only a few years older than him.

Here's something I bet you wont have realised though, Jennifer Aniston was exactly the same age when she made this film as Anne Bancroft was when she made The Graduate! For the record if you look it up Kevin Costner was 12 when The Graduate was released.

Background established sadly the film isn't very good. At the start there is something very father of the bride about the scene when Jen arrives back at the family home. In fact it takes a while to really go anywhere and on the whole it doesn't amount to much.

There is a developing theme with all these Project Jen films (a never ending parade of rom-coms). If there is anything funny happening, it happens around Jen, she is rarely even called on to try and be funny. I think its possible she is not very good at comedy!

Jen wears a short nightie in dark blue, very nice. In fact the costume designer did a pretty good job throughout the film. She deserves a name check and an IMDB link. Kym Barrett. Also at one point in the film someone suggests that Jen has nice hair and she should be a hair model - I've seen a number of her films now and I'm tempted to agree.

If you have two hours, watch the Graduate instead

Rating: 2 Green Dresses

Tuesday, March 26, 2013


SF: I'm going to name this Eternal Sunshine of the Gambit Inception. The opening did peak my interest - art heist film - but after a while it becomes too obvious what is happening and where it's going. This has no new ideas and throws in some ludicrous ones. All this achieved was rehashing concepts from superior films. The result is a boring thriller that has little to no emotion or originality. In facts some points are totally unwelcome (I've seen too much of Rosario Dawson). I can see how others might enjoy this but it really wasn't for me. 4/10

50Eggs: I find it difficult to score this. Clearly I'm not as clever as SF or DonkeyB because I didn't see the twists coming and, to be honest, I couldn't keep up with the plot. But I rather think that is a weakness of my brain rather than the film. That said there were a fair few scenes, particularly in the first half hour, that were very entertaining, and there was never any danger of me nodding off. Still, I'm going to have to plum for the score in the middle. 5/10

DonkeyB: It's a piece of nonsense. I'm 90% sure hypnosis is a cabaret act, and if it isn't it certainly can't work like that. You can't light petrol on fire by firing a gun at it either. However, as an elongated twilight zone episode which reminded me at times of limitless and was trying to be a bit inception I thought it was an ok entertainment. It is very predicable in its plot twist / revelations and making a plot point out of female pubic hair grooming is a touch gross. Vincent Cassell is always great watching and I didn't hate Rosario Dawson as much as I usually do, but all things considered I can't really give it a very strong endorsement. 6/10

Overall: 5/10

Sunday, March 17, 2013

Project Jen- Friends with Money

There are many many reasons I should love this film, Joan Cusack, Frances McDormand, Jason Isaacs, Simon McBurney. All actors I really like watching.

I have tried to watch this twice before and both times given up around 20 minutes in - I'm reviewing as I go this time as an incentive to get through, so lets see what happens.

20 minutes in and I already want to turn it off. It's a conversation about having a gay child, it's awful.

I don't identify with any of the characters, they're not believable, they're not interesting and everything about the film is unpleasant.

Jennifer wears a French maid outfit.

The good news is that the first 20 minutes are the worst and there are only 60 minutes afterwards.

It is still no good at all and utterly pointless. Don't watch it.

RATING: 1 Green Dress

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Oz: The Great and Powerful

SF: A prequel to The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, I fully expected to hate this but thankfully I didn't. The intro is one of the few that looks good in 3D and overall the film isn't bad. However it is not that great either, just alright. The effects are hit and miss, in that most of it looks great but there was loads that looked a bit unfinished. Maybe that was intentional. It deserves credit for keeping in line with the classic film and the cast do a fair job too. Good for a Sunday afternoon but a tad long for kids 6.5/10

50 Eggs: I liked this! It's an enjoyable adventure film, equal parts colorful, scary and funny. It's not a complex film but it's not as lightweight as most Disney, and it also contains enough odes to the original to make it feel like a genuine prequel, rather than a spin off. The pace does dip a little in the middle, but the finale is rousing and it's hard not to root
 for the good guys. Zach Braff makes a great monkey too. 8/10

DonkeyB: It felt very long to me. We saw a 3D screening and while as SF correctly points out the intro (another pop-up book style- layers of flat planes application) looks great [see also Beauty and the Beast], 3D presents a very serious problem for a film which is attempting to reproduce the almost psychadelic technicolor of the original film. Several times I removed the glasses and the screen was gloriously bright and vibrant, then I put my glasses back on and it was dull and had a slighlty green cast (no pun intended). I'm not sure why Mila Kunis had to wear leather effect leggings and rip off her bodice (to reveal another piece of ultra supportive female undergarment, its a family film), other than the fact that they had cast her. It lacked the magic of the original which I has the pleasure of watching on Friday afternoon, on a rare day off. As I commented to SF if you sat down with mummy on a Sunday afternoon to watch this Wizard of Oz, it would be bedtime by the time it finished. 5/10

Overall: 6.5/10

Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Cloud Atlas

SF: I never got around to reading Cloud Atlas, so I had nothing to compare this to. The idea of such a long film was a bit daunting. Following the future and past lives of serveral different people isn't a new idea but this execution was, I'm pleased to say, very engaging. With so many threads it is an incredibly hard film to describe but while you are watching everything falls seamlessly together. Every story draws you in and the pace of film ensures that audience is never given the time to notice the length. Also the production value is amazing, the effects, costumes, music and set are all stunning, in particular New Seoul. Well worth a cinema trip. 8/10

50 Eggs: I read the book of this several years ago and didn't think much of it, so it's perplexing that I like the movie as much as I do. With 6 different and complex stories being told over 3 hours, this had no right to work as a film, and lots of critics don't think it does. But I do, wholeheartedly. That's down to the editing which is just fantastic, seamlessly chopping between characters, decades and genres to create an experience much greater than the sum of its parts. It's not for everyone, but it is for me. 9/10

DonkeyB: n/a

Overall: 8.5/10

Friday, February 22, 2013

Awards 2012

Welcome to the 2nd Annual 3-4-1 Awards

We still have nothing to offer the Winner except our sincere admiration

Here are our nomination and winners in order of preference

Awards 2012

Best film
SF: Argo, Angel's Share, Untouchable
50 Eggs: 
Life of Pi, Cabin in the Woods, Avengers Assemble
DonkeyB: Argo, Skyfall, Angel's Share
Winner: Argo

Best Director:
SF: Ben Affleck (Argo), Ang Lee (Life of Pi), Joss Wheadon (Avengers Assemble)
50 Eggs: Ang Lee (Life of Pi),Pete Travis (Dredd 3D), Joss Wheadon (Cabin & Avengers)
DonkeyB: Ben Affleck (Argo), Sam Mendes (Skyfall), Steven Sodaberg (Haywire)
Winner:  Ben Affleck (Argo)

Best Actor in a Leading Role:
SF: Suraj Sharma (Life of Pi), Omar Sy (Untouchable), Mads Mikklesen (A Royal Affair)
50 Eggs: Suraj Sharma (Life of Pi), Michael Fassbender (Prometheus), Martin Freeman (The Hobbit)
DonkeyB: Jean Dujardin (The Artist), George Clooney (The Descendants), Mark Ruffalo (Avengers Assemble)
Winner: Suraj Sharma (Life of Pi)

Best Actor in a Supporting Role:
SF: Robert DeNiro (Sliver Linings Playbook), Ezra Miller (Perks of being a Wallflower) Tom Hiddleson (Avengers Assemble)
50 Eggs: Irrfan Khan (Life of Pi)
DonkeyB: Robert DeNiro (Sliver Linings Playbook), John Goodman (The Artist), John Henshaw (Angel's Share)
Winner: Robert DeNiro (Sliver Linnings Playbook)

Best Actress in a Leading Role:
SF: Marion Cotillard (Rust and Bone), Noomi Rapce (Prometheus), Jennifer Lawrence (Silver Linings Playbook)
50 Eggs: Jennifer Lawrence (That girl who is in Hunger Games)
DonkeyB: Marion Cotillard (Rust and Bone), Jennifer Lawrence (Silver Linings Playbook), Bernice Bijou (The Artist)
Winner: Marion Cotillard (Rust and Bone)

Best Actress in a Supporting Role:
SF: Maggie Smith (Best Exotic Marigold Hotel), Sigorney Weaver (Red Lights), Judy Dench (Skyfall)
50 Eggs: Emily Blunt (That girl who is in Looper )
DonkeyB: Anne Hathaway (Dark Knight Rises), Anna Kendrick (End of Watch), Judy Dench (Skyfall)
Winner: Judy Dench (Skyfall)

Best Animated Film:
SF: Brave, From up on Poppy Hill, Fullmetal Alchemist the star of Milos
50 Eggs: Brave
DonkeyB: Beauty and The Beast*, Brave, Pirates in an adventure with scientists
Winner: Brave
* But we all know Beauty and the Beast wins hands down but SF is refusing to nominate because of some silly new release nonsense

Best Cinematography:
SF: Skyfall, Dark Knight Rises, Jane Eyre
50 Eggs: Life of Pi, Prometheus, Skyfall
DonkeyB: Skyfall, Dark Knight Rises, The Artist
Winner:  Skyfall

Best Documentary Feature:*
SF: Search for Sugarman
50 Eggs: Nor me.
DonkeyB: Search for Sugarman
Winner: Search for Sugarman
* this award has been updated

Best Original Score:
SF: Patrick Doyle (Brave), Howard Shore (The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey), Thomas Newman (Skyfall)
50 Eggs: I never pay much attention so: Thomas Newman (Skyfall), Patrick Doyle (Brave), Howard Shore (The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey)
DonkeyB: James Newton-Howard (Snow White), Thomas Newman (Skyfall), Ludovic Bource (The Artist)
Winner: Thomas Newman (Skyfall)

Best Visual Effects:
SF: Avengers Assemble, Life of Pi, The Dark Knight Rises
50 Eggs: Life of Pi, Cabin in the Woods, Prometheus
DonkeyB: Skyfall, Dark Knight Rises, Avengers Assemble
Winner: Life of Pi

Best Adapted Screenplay:
SF: Eric Roth (Extremely Loud, Incredibly close), Stephen Chbosky  (Perks of being a Wallflower), David Magee (Life of Pi)
50 Eggs: Life of Pi, The Women in Black, The Hunger Games
DonkeyB: David O Russell (silver Linings Playbook), Stephen Chbosky  (Perks of being a Wallflower), Alexander Payne, Nat Faxon & Jim Rash (The Descendants)
Winner: Stephen Chbosky  (Perks of being a Wallflower)

Best Original Screenplay:
SF: Ken Loach (Angel's Share), Rian Johnson (Looper), Olivier Nakache & Eric Toledano (The Untouchables)
50 Eggs: I think we have too many categories.
DonkeyB: Ken Loach (Angel's Share), The Artist, Ted
Winner: Ken Loach (Angel's Share)

**** Now some fun awards****

Most divisive film:
Ruby Sparks
Life of Pi
Winner : Ruby Sparks

Worst Film:
SF: Total Recall, Beasts of the Southern Wild, This Means War
50 Eggs: The Amazing Spider-man, War Horse, John Carter
DonkeyB: This Means War, Total Recall, Battleship
Winner: Total Recall - We still don't understand how they messed this up

Worst actor:
SF: Sam Worthington (Wrath of the Titans), Ryhs Iffans (The Amazing Spider-man), Nicholas Cage (Ghost Rider the Spirit of Vengeance) - honourable mention the whole cast in battleship.
50 Eggs: Sam Worthington (Wrath of the Titans), Ryhs Iffans (the Amazing spider-man)
DonkeyB: Colin Farrell (Total Recall), Tom Hanks (Extremley Loud, Incredibly Close), Ryhs Iffans (The Amazing Spider-man)
Winner: Sam Worthing (Wrath of the Titans)

Worst actress:
SF:Kate Beckinsale (Total Recall & Underworld Awakening), Reese Witherspoon (This Means War), Kristen Stewart (Snow White and the Huntsman)
50 Eggs: Nope, cant think of any.
DonkeyB: Kate Beckinsale (Total Recall), Reese Witherspoon (This Means War), Cameron Diaz (Gambit)
Winner: Kate Beckinsale (Total Recall & Underworld Awakening)

Most awful contribution to cinema in 2012:
SF: is it wrong to give it to 3D again?
50 Eggs: Nothing wrong with 3D but I’m going to say rebooting Spiderman with the same story but less good a few years after the last one.
DonkeyB: The audience we watched Gambit with- they laughed at the production studio cards!, 3D, The titles in The Raven completely out of character with the rest of the film.
Winner: 3D stoppit already, blurry, dark and pointless